"10 I rejoiced greatly in the Lord that at last you renewed your concern for me. Indeed, you were concerned, but you had no opportunity to show it. 11 I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. 12 I
know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I
have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation,
whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. 13 I can do all this through him who gives me strength." Philippians 4: 10 - 13
This passage of scripture speaks to me right now more than any other. Specifically the part where Paul says that he has learned to be content whatever the circumstances.
What does that mean, to be content? What does it look like to be content no matter the circumstances? Being content is easy when things are going well and all happening like they should without hiccups. But what happens when life gives us lemons, so to speak? It's not always making lemonade that follows the newly acquired lemons in our lives. Often, those lemons make us bitter. We want to throw them out the window, not make a deliciously sweet, yet refreshingly tangy drink to share with our closest friends. We whine, we cry, we moan. When did I order all these lemons and why in the world do I need them right now??
Because I want you to have them, God said.
I tried to imagine Paul in all his different circumstances. I imagined him being in prison, as we know he was for some time. How easy would it be to lean up against a cold prison cell wall, knowing you may never get out, and just say thank you for being alive today?
Most of us will probably never be in prison, but we will feel that way sometimes. We all will have times of need. As a soon to be "helping professional" I have been trained to find solutions to people's problems and meet their needs. One thing I have learned about myself through my journey of schooling and training is that I can help meet others' needs only to a certain extent. Sometimes you can only do so much. I have seen people trying to battle addiction while battling with the state to get their children back. The pain that you see in the eyes of someone who's family has been ripped apart and they have nowhere to turn is like no other. Many of those people wanted to change. They wanted to see better days, but there was only so much we could do. Eventually, they had to make a choice. Denying themselves (meaning getting help for addiction, giving up drugs, go to counseling, etc.) to better their family. That was a choice. And the people I worked with as an intern who were managing those cases, they could only help a person so much before it became the person's responsibility to fuel the fire that leads to change in their circumstances.
In the same way, I have had to learn that what I do when life gives me lemons is my choice. I can choose to be happy and make lemonade, or I can be resistant and throw perfectly good lemons out the window. What I mean by that is I can make do with the things that I do have, instead of throwing them all away because I did not get exactly what I wanted. Another thing I have realized about contentment in all circumstances is that you will never be content if you are always wanting what you cannot have. Often I feel that as Christians, we think that if we give faithfully to the church and volunteer our time and read our Bibles that God will bring blessings. He does, do not get me wrong. But He does not always bring material blessings. And when all you want out of your faith is to do enough for God to give you all the material things you desire, you will be sorely disappointed.
See Paul never said he was rich and got lots of cool stuff in exchange for all the good he did to further God's kingdom and help build the church. He had some good times and he had some really bad times (remember prison). He simply said that he knew what it was like to be in need and what it was like to not be in need and he had learned to be content either way. I know why. Because he chose to have faith in God and not worry about the future.
See Jesus told us in Matthew 7:
31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
Our Heavenly Father knows that we need stuff. We cannot survive without some material sustenance. It is perfectly all right to be concerned about finances when you find yourself in a situation of need. However, it will be impossible to be content and at peace about your situation when you are constantly worrying. Paul also said that he could do all things through Him who gave him strength. Not only did God care for Paul's necessities at all times, He strengthened Paul to be content through all circumstances.
Life has handed me a pretty big batch of lemons the past few weeks. We started the new year off with the "Year of Prosperity", as my husband told me. However, the year also started off with financial struggles for us. We have *gasp* had to cut out cable TV and most of our dates now consist of eating food together I made at home and watching some of our old movies. I dedicate a few hours a week to checking the couponing websites and clipping coupons to get the best deals at the grocery store. What extra money that does come in we save to fix the hubby's poor old Eclipse (car) and save for our future home, which we will hopefully find and move in to by the end of this year. We are not poor. We still have stable income. It's just not what we had last year. I keep looking back and thinking how times were so good when I could DVR my favorite show instead of having to wait for it to come on Netflix. I look back and think about how much money we used to spend going out on dates and out to the movies. It has made me so sad. My bitterness and discontent has not helped our marriage, either. The whole time I have been struggling with this, my hubby has stood by and reminded me that I have to choose to make the best of my situation. He reminded me that this is only for a season and that I need to put my faith in God.
He's right. I do. There are so many things that have become painful for me throughout the process and the change in finances. It's embarrassing sometimes to turn down an offer to lunch after church because you really shouldn't spend the money. It's hard to put that tithe check in the bucket each week when your mind wanders to how that money in your pocket could have been put toward cable TV. It's hard to walk past stores in the mall and not be tempted to spend money you don't have.
But it's good, too. These past couple of months have been good for me. I have been learning to save. I have been learning not to waste food and learned new recipes that use items I already have in my fridge and pantry instead of running to the store and buying it all every time I cook. Less money is wasted on buying coffee in between my classes. I bring my own with me. Grocery shopping has become fun for me because it is like a challenge with coupons and sales to get the most groceries for the lowest price. Lately I have learned to be content with a little. It is a whole lot harder than being content with a lot.
Things are looking up for us financially. I recently started selling Thirty One and I am loving that! I graduate in a few months and will be ready to start working somewhere full time instead of just part time. That will help our monthly budget. My hubby is working hard and he is doing well. Things are becoming stable again. But now, we have decided that we will not stop our new lifestyle even if we end up having more money soon. Because the way we are living now means that we spend more dates at home in peace and quiet instead of a noisy restaurant. We can actually talk to each other and not get distracted by loud music and waiters dropping plates or something. We have both found new ways to save money by making simple changes and that is going to help us going forward as we look to buy a house and eventually start a family. A lesson learned now means that we are equipped for the future. God wanted us to go through this time of need to learn how to be content even when we aren't in need, to be content no matter where we are in our lives.
That's what making "lemonade" is all about.
God Bless,
Julia
